Pregnant after Valentine's Day

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14th February:  Valentine's Day
14th November:  Woman pregnant

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Mom taught you how to use spoon !

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To my children:
Never make fun of having to help me with computer stuff.
Remember
I taught you how to use a spoon.

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Senior citizens - Bum like pumpkin

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Husband to pumpkin: I made you a cup of tea, dear.
Wife: I'm over here.

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Fried egg

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He died last fry day.
Thank God he wasn't beaten.
Don't worry, he went over easy.
He's now on the sunny side.
He's definitely in a better plate.

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