iPhone, iPod, iPad, iPaid

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Son         : iPone
Daugther: iPod
Wife        : iPad
Husband: iPaid !

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Marital Status vs Neckline

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The neckline tell you whether she is:
Single - Married - Happily married

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How stupid can you be

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I have to stop saying 'How stupid can you be'.
I think people are starting to take it
as a challenge.

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Ask for salary increase by shaving pubic hair

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Husband:
Today I have a meeting with my boss,
to ask for an increase in my salary.

Wife: Me Too.

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Studying and dying

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Studying -
    Notice how they conveniently put "dying"
    at the end of the word.

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Women with fake body parts want real man

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So let me get this straight ...

Women have fake hair, nails, lashes, contacts.
Buy fake boobs, lips and get Botox.
But they want a real man ?

Good luck with that !

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World's narrowest street, Reutlingen, Germany

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Spreuerhofstrasse (Spreuerhofstraße)
is the world's narrowest street,
found in the city of Reutlingen,
Baden-Württemberg, Germany.

It ranges:
from 31 centimetres (12.2 in) at its narrowest
to 50 centimetres (19.7 in) at its widest.

The lane was built in 1727
during the reconstruction efforts
after the area was completely destroyed
in the massive city-wide fire of 1726.

Now,
it is officially listed in the Land-Registry Office
as City Street Number 77.

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Heavy load in China

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Only in Asia!

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Weather forecasting stone

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Stone is wet ... Rain
Stone is dry ... not raining
Shadow on ground ... Sunny
White on top ... Snowing
Can't see stone ... Foggy
Swinging stone ... Windy
Stone jumping up and down ... Earthquake
Stone gone ... Tornado


John's weather forecasting stone

Gary's weather forecasting stone

Serpent River weather Station

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Snow tunnel, near Mutnovsky Volcano

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This snow tunnel near the Mutnovsky Volcano
in Russia is almost a kilometre long.

These tunnels form under the snow fields
in deep ravines at the end of the summer thaw.

Meltwater flows through glaciers
towards lower elevations,
finding an outlet at the terminus of the glacier
and carving the ice on the way.

The Mutnovsky Volcano is found in the
southern part of the Kamchatka Peninsula.

The photo of the snow tunnel was taken
with three light sources:
    - a torch
    - flash
    - natural light from the exit
holding for 2 seconds.

Photo credit: Michael Zelensky
Source was:
http://www.photokamchatka.ru/photos/photo.php?ID=9225
Now defunct.

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Student's bad grade

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Parents to teacher:
Explain these bad grades ?  ... before and now

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Mushroom looks like a penis

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"Hi, I'm a broccoli and I look like a tree."
"I'm a walnut and I look like a brain."
"I'm a mushroom and I hate this stupid game."

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Lenticular Clouds

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Lenticular cloud is a rarely seen cloud formation.
This one is observed over West Yorkshire
in Britain.

The below photo is in the sky above Grytviken,
South Georgia island,
at the cold edge of Southern Atlantic Ocean.

Image Credit: Masumi Tashiro

For more information on lenticular clouds, see
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lenticular_cloud

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Old woman wants a pat down, not flying.

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Old woman to airport security officer:

Oh, I'm not flying anywhere.
I'm just here for the pat down.

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Mother duck losing ducklings down the drain

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Ooops, a bad mother !

Ducklings down the drain !

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Stop Deforestation !

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Deforestation of female from 1940 - 2010

Stop deforestation !

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Strassburg Sock to cure Plantar Fasciitis

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Looks like a sock for fancy dress parties !

But actually, it is a Strassburg Sock
to cure Plantar Fasciitis (heel pain).

The Sock bends the toes, and
you are to wear the sock to sleep every night.

In about a month, it should cure the
Plantar Fasciitis.

See the
    "Prolog of Prolog"
    "Plantar Fasciitis"
sections of my account on this matter:
http://mntviews.blogspot.com/2012/07/zeil-nt-australia.html

Why does bending the toes has anything
to do with heel Pain ?
It is a mystery to me 😊

The web site for the Sock is:
http://thesock.com/
May be you can read it and tell me the reason.

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Vibrating statictic picture

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This is a static picture, not a vibrating gif !!!
Isn't it amazing !!!

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Say the colour, not the word! (An illustration of left brain right brain conflict)

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Left-right brain conflict

Look at the chart below,
and say the colour, not the word.

(Your right brain tries to say the colour.
But ...
Your left brain insists on reading the word.)

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Job interview & breast size

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Success in job interview
is directly proportional to breast size.

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Coolest negative image

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This one is the best I've seen so far !!!

Instructions:
1.  Stare at the red dot on the girl's nose
      for 30 seconds.
2.  Turn your eyes to a plain surface
      (your ceiling or blank wall).
3.  Blink repeatedly and quickly.

Tell me if that isn't the coolest thing !

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Peeled oranges

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Orange peeled to shape like a pregnant woman

Orange peeled to shape like a man with a penis

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My ex

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I still miss my ex.
But my aim is getting better!

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Climbing goats at Agadir, Morocco

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Climbing goats at Agadir, Morocco - June 2012

Many thanks to Danielle Petrie
for sharing her photo.

The secret to the goats ability to climb
lies in the shape of their hooves.

The keratin reinforced hoof wall adds strength,
while the soft textured sole provides traction
and grip. It's also capable of deforming inwards
to counter irregularities in the terrain.

Their toes are capable of operating independently
giving them more of a "grip".


These cloven-hoofed goats only climb
one particular type of tree: the Argania spinosa,
typically referred to as the Argan Tree.


The tree is endemic to southwest Morocco.

A prickly and thorny tree,
it produces small yellowish flowers,
which then produce a fairly small fruit.

The fruit’s seed is within a nut,
which is further surrounded by soft flesh
and a tough outer skin.


The fruit’s pulp is what attracts the goats
to the Argan Trees.

While the creatures will happily keep all hooves
firmly on the ground
and graze on low-hanging fruit,
but once they have gobbled
the easy-to-reach produce,
they will scramble up into the tree
in search of more.


The fruit is not consumed by humans.

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Heterosapiens

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Then I told the teacher:
Lady, I ain't no Homosapien. I'm a Heterosapien.

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Tortoise & Hare race

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Tortoise: First one home wins.
Hare:       Deal   ...   Dammit.

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Shoes - Difference between men and women

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Women's shoes  vs  men's shoes
at special events:

- Gym
- Work
- School
- Party
- Walking
- Pool
- Beach
- Home
- When it is raining
- At a ball

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Elephant & Camel

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Elephant:
Why do you have 2 boobs on your back ?

Camel:
That's a silly question from someone
who has a dick on his face.

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Babies of man

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Difference in babies ...
between single man and family man

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Password is wedding anniversary date

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Husband: "Honey, what's the password?"
Wife: "Our anniversary date."
Husband ... She did this on purpose.

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Cheating during exam

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Teachers call it cheating.
We call it teamwork.

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Male patient on a stretcher with his head under nurse's skirt

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Do I detect a smile on the nurse's face ?  :-)

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Heart shape

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This photo of a heart formed by two geese
was taken at Featherdale Wildlife Park,
Sydney, Australia.
It is so cute !

The following heart shape formed by people
jumping into the air is interesting,
but not sure whether it is done by photo editing.

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Wish for more genies

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Guy: (Rubing an oil lamp)

Genie: (Out of the lamp)
    Behold !
    I am the Genie of the lamp,
    and I have come to grant you three wishes !
    What is thy first wish ?

Guy:
    More wishes !

Genie:
    A genie can only grant three wishes.
    This is the law.

Guy:
    More genies !

Genie: (With three more genies)
    Fuck.

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Rape-aXe - an anti rape device

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Initially called RapeX,
this anti-rape female condom
has since been re-named to Rape-aXe in 2006.

It was invented by Sonnet Ehlers,
a South African woman,
who was motivated to create it
while working as a blood technician
with the South African Blood Transfusion Service.

During this period, she met many rape patients,
and was inspired by a particular victim who said,
"If only I had teeth down there."

It is basically a female condom
with teeth lining the inside that works just like
the protective spikes in a parking garage ...

You can go in, but whatever you do, don't back out.

The teeth are angled so they allow penetration,
but bite like a shark as the penis is removed;
supposedly causing so much pain that
it will give the woman a chance to escape.

Further, according to Ms Ehlers, the device
will need to be surgically removed at a hospital,
which will lead to capture of the rapist.

I want to know how did they field test it ?!?

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Mathematical Puzzle

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a = 0.99999...
10a = 9.99999...
10a = 9 + 0.99999...
10a = 9 + a
9a = 9
a = 1
1 = 0.99999... !!!

Actually, there is no discrepancy.

Although the above proof lacks
mathematical vigour, but ...

In mathematics, the repeating decimal 0.99999...
can be shown to be equal to the number 1.

In other words, the symbols 0.99999... and 1
represent the same number.

Refer Wikipedia:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/0.999

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Hey Lady, You ain't fooling anybody!

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Drawing of a slim body on a fat woman's dress 😊

"Hey lady,
You ain't fooling anybody ! 😊"

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Dalai Lama's thoughts on humanity

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The Dalai Lama, when asked
what surprised him most about humanity,
answered:

Man.

Because he sacrifices his health
in order to make money.

Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health.

And then he is so anxious about the future
that he does not enjoy the present.

The result being that
he does not live in the present or the future ...

He lives as if he is never going to die,
and then dies having never really lived.

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Electricity power outlet sex

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Sex in the eye of an electrician ...

Nothing more dangerous
than an electrician with a pen

I'll never look at a power outlet the same again !

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Girl don't trust men

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One of my 5 boyfriends slept with another girl.
I'll never trust men again.

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Red highheels

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Give a girl the right shoes and
she can conquer the world.
-- Marilyn Monroe

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Difference between the sexes - room and car

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Difference between:
     - Girls' room  and  Boys' room
     - Girls' car  and  Boys' car

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Shadow - beautiful curvaceous girl is a person with a mop

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Love at first sight !

Calm down !  Calm down !
The shadow is a cleaner with a mop.

Not a beautiful curvaceous girl 😊

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