Female archaeologists

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Fun fact:

A majority of archaeologists are women
due to their natural ability to dig up the past.

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I'm so good at sleeping

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I'm so good at sleeping. I can do it with my eyes closed.

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Healthy eating

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Trying to eat healthy
Salad with bacon bits

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Allow government to break law during an emergency

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If you allow the government to break the law during an emergency,
They will create an emergency to break the law.

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How Uluru / Ayers Rock in Australia was formed

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To all of you who didn't pay attention to
geology classes in school ...

Meteor / Barringer Crater in Arizona, USA ...
from a hard meteorite impact.
     and
Uluru / Ayers Rock in Northern Territory,
Australia ...

how it was formed.

Above should prove to any flat-earthers
that our Earth is round.

By the way, the Australian government
sensibly banned climbing Uluru.

Otherwise you'll fall into outer space.

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Count the number of buttons

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Quiz time !
Count the number of buttons.

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New newspaper everyday

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Wife: I could have been born as the newspaper,
         so that you will hold me with so much excitement everyday.
Husband: Please be aware, that I don't read the same newspaper everyday.

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Same purple dress

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Wife to husband:

In case you didn't notice,
I'm wearing the same dress !

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A day in the life of ZCC

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Anna (ZCC晨) Zhang's day in the Australian bush
(Blackmans Crown)

1)  Anna's motto: Leave no tree unclimbed  :-)

Photographer: Stanley

2)  Anna's motto: Leave no gap unjumped  :-)
(Careful !
Don't overshoot !
Vertical drop on the other side !)

Photographer: Lora

3)  Anna's motto: Leave no cliff unscaled  :-)
(She is heading towards the rock at the red arrow.)

4)  Anna's motto: Leave no stone unsat  :-)

Photographer: David

5)  Anna's motto: Leave no hole unpeeped  :-)

Photographer: Stanley

6)  Anna's motto: Leave no chasm uncrossed  :-)

Photographer: Lora

7)  You get the gist  :-)

Location: Blackmans Crown
                 (near Capertee)
                 NSW, Australia
Date       : 2022-May-29

Trip report and more interesting photographs:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Kb2pvWOfm9dNKrOuqzpiKnq06htg0qfz/view

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Newton's 4th law of motion

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Newton's lesser known 4th law of motion

A student in bed will remain in bed,
unless acted upon by a large enough panic.

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Scotty, don't beam me up yet

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Scotty, don't beam me up yet.
I'm taking a sh...

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Iridescent clouds

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Iridescent clouds

Location           : Top of Saddleback Mountain, Kiama, NSW, Australia
Date                  : 2022-05-07  11am
Photographers: 1st one - Lisa Li.  Rest - Paul.

An iridescent cloud is an uncommon phenomenon, the result of diffraction ... small droplets of water or small crystals of ice individually scattering light.

If the small droplets/crystals are of similar size, their cumulative effect is seen as iridescent colours. The cloud must be optically thin, so that most rays encounter only a single droplet. Iridescence is therefore mostly seen at cloud edges or in semi-transparent clouds.


Here is another iridescent cloud I photographed 7 years ago.
Location: Gungartan Mountain, Kosciuszko National Park, NSW, Australia
Date       : 2015-03-13

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Multitasking at my old age

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At my old age, I'm good at multitasking.
I can listen, ignore and forget all at once.

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2 hours to pass female cyclists

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Bloody women cyclists.
It took me 2 hours to get past them.

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After birth, how long does it take for the eyes to open ?

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After birth,
how long does it take for the eyes to open :
    -  Cows     : Immediately
    -  Goats    : After 2 hours
    -  Cats      : After 6 days
    -  Dogs     : After 10 days
    -  Humans: After Marriage !

😊 😊 😊 😊 😊

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Skimpy panty

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By the time I realized that it was a shopping bag,
I already missed the bus !

Here is another woman wearing a skimpy panty  :-)

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Sister is older

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Sometimes I feel old.
But then I realize my sister is older.

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Mathematical equations for breasts

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Simple curve

A simple mathematical equation
for a buxom lady's breasts:

y = (1 - (|x|-1)^2)^0.5
   which is equivalent to
y = Sqrt(2*|x| - x^2)

A plot of the real part of the breasts,
ignoring the imaginary part  :-)

Not good enough for you ?
Try the next one !



More realistic curve

y = Sqrt(1 - (|x|-1)^2) + Sqrt(0.01 - (x+1)^2) + Sqrt(0.01 - (x-1)^2)
   which is equivalent to
y = Sqrt(2*|x| - x^2) + Sqrt(0.01 - (x+1)^2) + Sqrt(0.01 - (x-1)^2)

A plot of the real part of the breasts,
again ignoring the imaginary part  :-)

More complicated equation

This one was taken from somewhere
on the internet few years ago.
Unfortunately, now I couldn't find the source
nor the author anymore  :-(

y =
   sqrt(1 - (x+3/2)^2 / (1+(x+3/2)^10)^(1/5))
+ sqrt(1 - (10x+15)^2 / (1+(10x+15)^10)^(1/5)) /10
+ sqrt(1 - (x-3/2)^2 / (1+(x-3/2)^10)^(1/5))
+ sqrt(1 - (10x-15)^2 / (1+(10x-15)^10)^(1/5)) /10

3D surface

A 3D surface for breasts:

z = 4*x*y - x^4 - y^4

Source:
https://www.chegg.com/homework-help/questions-and-answers/surface-z-4xy-x-4-y-4-graphed-two-absolute-maximums-find-values-maximums-q11144119



Other mathematical equations for:
Heart, Bum, Penis, Boomerang

They are covered in my blogs:
https://onemanadreaming.blogspot.com/2014/08/mathematical-equation-of-love-heart.html
   and
https://onemanadreaming.blogspot.com/2014/04/from-golden-ratio-to-golden-arse.html

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Teach a man how to fish

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Give a man a fish and he eats for a day.
Teach him how to fish and he can avoid the wife for a whole weekend !

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If people stand up ...

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If people stand up, the corrupt party is over !

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Fancy a quickie

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The dangers of predictive text  :-)

Quiche $6.95 each
"Fancy a quickie" ... as received by nun

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Super giant Jeremy

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Super giant Jeremy compared to Ruoran Zhou !

Date: 2015-October-25

Location:
    West Tinderry Firetrail
    Tinderry Nature Reserve
    NSW, Australia

We were on our way to climb Tinderry Twin Peak,
then to Tinderry Peak.

More photographs and trip report
from the bushwalk are in this link:
https://mntviews.blogspot.com/2015/10/tinderry-twin-tinderry-peak-nsw.html


By the way,
if you know the whereabouts of Ruoran Zhou,
please contact me.
Or ask her to contact me.

My email address: mntviews@gmail.com

Thank you !


Background:

- Ruoran Zhou was born in China.
- Studied & worked in Denmark.
- Came to Sydney Australia in 2014 (or 2015) ???

- Hobby in Sydney: Bushwalking / climbing / hiking
  That's how I knew her.

- Left Australia in 2016.
  Perhaps around Oct/Nov/Dec ???
  To Denmark/China ???

- No one in Australia has heard from her since 😭


Some photographs of Ruoran Zhou are in this link:
https://onemanadreaming.blogspot.com/2022/03/ruoran-zhou.html

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Ruoran Zhou

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Please help to locate Ruoran Zhou !

If you know her whereabouts, contact me.
Or ask her to contact me.
( My email address: mntviews@gmail.com )

Thank you !


Background:

- Ruoran Zhou was born in China.
- Studied & worked in Denmark.
- Came to Sydney Australia in 2014 (or 2015) ???

- Hobby in Sydney: Bushwalking / climbing / hiking
  That's how I knew her.

- Left Australia in 2016.
  Perhaps around Oct/Nov/Dec ???
  To Denmark/China ???

- No one in Australia has heard from her since 😭


The pictures below were from 2015 / 2016,
in the Australian bush.

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https://mntviews.blogspot.com/

Russian girls say Putin

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Plenty of jokes on Vladimir Putin
when he ordered the Russian army
to invade Ukraine in February 2022.

Here is one:

In Russia, we girls don't say yes to sex ...
We say "Putin" 😊

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Water is essential for coffee

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Lucy:  Did you know that water is the most essential element of life ?
Linus:  Yes, because without water, you can't make coffee.

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Pregnant after Valentine's Day

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14th February:  Valentine's Day
Man chases woman.

14th November:  Woman pregnant
Woman chases man.

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Mom taught you how to use spoon !

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To my children:
Never make fun of having to help me with computer stuff.
Remember
I taught you how to use a spoon.

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Senior citizens - Bum like pumpkin

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Husband to pumpkin: I made you a cup of tea, dear.
Wife: I'm over here.

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Fried egg

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He died last fry day.
Thank God he wasn't beaten.
Don't worry, he went over easy.
He's now on the sunny side.
He's definitely in a better plate.

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Boils examination

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Doctor to nurse:

No no nurse !
I said examine his boils !

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Love rumours

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I love rumours.
I always find out amazing things about muself I never knew.

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Hug, coffee and 5 million dollars

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Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say :
    I know it's hard.
    You're going to be ok.
    Here's a coffee and 5 million dollars.

"I got the flu and not an aficionado of coffee.
So, forget about the hug and coffee.
Give me a beer and the 5 million dollars would do."

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Phone call durations

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Different types of phone call durations:
    00:00:58  Boy to Boy
    00:00:45  Boy to Mom
    00:00:20  Boy to Dad
    01:13:59  Boy to Girl
    02:35:20  Girl to Girl
    00:00:03  Husband to Wife
    04:05:15  Mom to Married daughter
    12 missed calls   Wife to Husband

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